Alone but Not Lonely

I love being alone. It gives me time to think, write, make, plan, dream, etc.

I do a lot of thinking about a million things. I don't call it overthinking, that's usually a bad thing. I also sometimes just stare. Stare out a window, stare at people in the doughnut shop while I'm on break, stare at falling snow. Sometimes I sing really loud when I'm alone because I know I won't be bothering anyone else, but sometimes when I'm alone, I'm especially quiet because I enjoy the break in noise. Sometimes I sit down with my journal and write things I'm feeling or going through or experiences I've had recently. Sometimes I just pull out the Bible and read anything because I get really hungry and want to gobble up the Word.

So, I'm probably a bit of a loner, and I don't mind. It might sound depressing to some people, but to me, it's joy.

However, I do not like being lonely. The feeling of loneliness can come when you're surrounded by people. When I'm in a crowd I can feel extremely lonely, especially if no one notices me or talks with me. I can feel lonely with a group of friends because I can be distracted and left out. Sometimes I feel like I just don't fit in. I feel like an outsider among many insiders.

That might now always be the right response to certain situations, it's just the way I often feel. I think it's often just a personality thing, but sometimes I think it's something deeper. I might have a hard time relating to people because of something going on in my life that others can't relate to. There are indeed things from my past that other people can't understand. That's OK. The fact is that many of us are actually experiencing the same problems, we just think everyone else is fine.

Many people feel lonely even though they are surrounded by good friends.

Take heart. If you're one of those people or you're just going through a phase, there is hope. God told the Israelites in Deuteronomy 31:6, "Be strong and courageous; don't be terrified or afraid of them. For it is the Lord your God who goes with you; He will not leave you or forsake you." And the writer of Hebrews reminds us, "Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you” (13:5).

So, the feeling of loneliness is very real for many folks, but God is always there for you, even when people are absent or you're having a hard time connecting with friends. 

Also, enjoy being alone if that's refreshing to you. Don't worry if people think it's odd or think you need more "people time." Enjoy the quiet.